Stresses of College Students
The Stress of a College Student
Being back on campus can be exciting. It’s a new year with new opportunities and connecting again with friends you haven’t seen in months. But are you back on campus and already overwhelmed? Does it feel like your to-do list is growing faster than your energy? Or maybe you’re a parent, and your student seems more irritable, anxious, or exhausted than excited now that school is actually here.
Whether you’re packing for your first semester, returning to check off another semester, or knee-deep in finals, college isn’t just about classes and fun. It’s a pressure cooker of deadlines, decisions, and expectations. College can serve as such a pivotal moment in a person’s life, however, also can sometimes take a toll on one’s mental health.
Let’s Talk 10 Areas of Stress College Students Face:
1. Academic Stress and Burnout
Overwhelming coursework, constant pressure to perform, and highly competitive academic environments can quickly lead to chronic stress and burnout for college students. Many find themselves juggling intense class loads with extracurriculars and part-time jobs, all while trying to meet high expectations. Challenges like poor time management, perfectionism, and a deep fear of failure often make things worse turning everyday stress into a persistent mental and emotional weight.
2. Anxiety and Depression
If you’ve felt unusually anxious, emotionally numb, or unmotivated, you’re not making it up. Rates of anxiety and depression are higher than ever, nearly 3 in 4 college students report moderate to high stress, and 35% have an official anxiety diagnosis. Rates of generalized anxiety disorder and major depressive disorder are rising steadily among college students, reflecting a growing mental health crisis on campuses. These conditions are often triggered by a combination of factors, including social isolation, academic pressure, financial stress, and uncertainty about the future. As these stressors pile up, many students find it increasingly difficult to cope without support. Therapy addressing these issues is often critical to keep the young adult on track and successful.
3. Social Media and Digital Overload
You know that moment when you’re just “checking Instagram for five minutes” and suddenly it’s 2 a.m. and you feel terrible? Perhaps the scroll lasted so long due to “Fear of missing out” (FOMO). Social media can increase connection but also fuel anxiety, loneliness, and unhealthy comparisons. The phrase “doom scrolling” is also one you may have heard of relating to the negative emotional toll that social media can cause. Frequent use of social media without moderations often times affects self-esteem, sleep, and attention span. Counseling is sometimes considered as a way to help set better boundaries around technology when the compulsion is very strong.
4. Loneliness and Social Isolation
Many students report feeling disconnected from their peers, a trend that has become even more pronounced in the post-pandemic era. Forming genuine friendships can be especially difficult for introverted students or those navigating remote or hybrid learning environments, where organic social interaction is limited. As a result, many college students who seek out therapy are experiencing this. This sense of isolation can leave students feeling alone, unsupported, and detached from campus life.
5. Substance Use and Coping Mechanisms
Whether it’s caffeine for cramming, alcohol at parties, or weed to unwind… substance use is common on college campuses. But when it becomes a way to escape or cope, itcan quietly make mental health worse instead of better. When a college student leans into substances to cope, mental health therapy becomes critical to learn healthy coping skills. Otherwise, dependency can become a lifelong struggle.
6. Imposter Syndrome
Ever feel like you’re faking it and it’s just a matter of time before everyone finds out? You’re not alone. Imposter syndrome affects even the most capable students and can sabotage confidence, relationships, and academic performance. Many students struggle with imposter syndrome feeling like a fraud despite clear evidence of their competence and accomplishments. This is especially common among high-achieving individuals, first-generation college students, and those from marginalized backgrounds or competitive academic programs.
7. Financial Stress
Balancing tuition, books, rent, and basic needs creates major pressure. Students with financial insecurity often feel they can’t afford to take a break even when they’re struggling mentally or physically.
8. Identity and Belonging
Exploring who you are racially, culturally, sexually… can be powerful. But it can also feel isolating, especially if your campus lacks diversity or understanding. Many students navigate discrimination, microaggressions, or fear of not being accepted. Often times in the therapy world, students can learn the language for what they are experiencing. This eventually gives them the power to not feel personally at fault for the larger societal systems.
9. The Stigma around Mental Health
Students often feel like their problems “aren’t bad enough” to justify counseling or they’re afraid of what others might think. But ignoring mental health concerns doesn’t make them disappear. The stigma is fading, but it still holds many students back.
10. Sleep and Mental Health
Pulling all-nighters or crashing for four hours a night might seem like a normal part of college but sleep deprivation has serious consequences. Memory can be significantly impacted when sleep health is not addressed. Lack of sleep also affects concentration, mood, immune function, and long-term mental health.
Tired of Carrying the Weight Alone?
Let’s be real: college is one of the most important, transitional, and intense periods of your life. And while friends, mentors, and parents can offer support, there are times where you just need more.
That’s where therapy comes in.
Whether you’re trying to manage anxiety, heal from burnout, figure out your identity, or just get through the semester without falling apart, therapy gives you the tools to handle life, not just survive it.
Here’s what therapy can do for you:
- Help you understand what’s really behind your stress
- Teach coping strategies that actually work in real-time
- Offer support that’s judgment-free, confidential, and built around your goals
- Give you a safe space to talk about things you can’t say anywhere else
- Help you build routines, set boundaries, and feel more like yourself
And to parents reading this: encouraging your student to explore therapy doesn’t mean something’s wrong it means you care. Normalizing mental health support is one of the best gifts you can give them.
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Kids and Screen Time: Tips for the School Year
Kids and Screen Time: Tips for the School Year
The Digital Dilemma of Parenting
Is your child glued to a screen, even when they should be doing homework or playing outside? Let’s face it, what started out as a simple way for you to keep your kids occupied while you get things done, has turned into their secret obsession with screen time. Screens are now embedded in daily life—used for schoolwork, social interaction, and entertainment. While technology can be educational, excessive screen use has been linked to sleep disturbances, behavioral concerns, and visual strain.
A recent study (Psychological Bulletin, 2025) analyzing data from nearly 300,000 children found a strong correlation between screen overuse—particularly time spent on video games—and increased social and emotional challenges.
When Tech Takes Over the Emotional Impacts are Obvious
Oftentimes, youth are more irritable, distracted, and unfocused when they have had extended periods of screentime. You’re not imagining it. Research shows that too much screen time can overstimulate the brain, leading to difficulties in focus and emotional regulation.
But here’s the good news: you have the power to help your child develop a healthier relationship with screens. It starts with setting clear, consistent limits and encouraging other activities that promote well-being.
Navigating the Detox Phase from Screens
As you begin to set new screen time boundaries, it’s normal for your child to go through an adjustment period often called a “detox” phase. It’ll start out little bumpy at first. Kids will likely be more moody, say they’re bored, or push back against the new rules. This “detox” phase is totally normal it’s just their brain adjusting to less stimulation.
The most important thing during this phase is patience, and to stick with it! Stay calm, be consistent, and offer fun alternatives like playing outside, reading, or doing something creative together. Most kids settle into the new routine within a few days or weeks, and many become more focused, calmer, and even happier.
Just like with any healthy habit, the initial discomfort often gives way to surprising benefits. Many parents find that after a few days or weeks, their children become calmer, more focused, and more engaged with the world around them.
Creating a Healthier Routine
To foster a balanced lifestyle:
- Set Clear Screen Time Limits
Establish daily screen time limits based on your child’s age and needs. For instance, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no more than one hour per day of recreational screen time for children aged 2 to 5 years. School age children are recommended to keep screen time at a range of 1.5-2 hours
- Create Screen-Free Zones
Designate certain areas of your home, like the dining room or bedrooms, as screen-free zones. This encourages face-to-face interactions and helps establish boundaries between leisure and rest.
- Encourage Physical Activity
Make sure your child has plenty of opportunities for physical activity, whether it’s playing outside, participating in sports, or just taking breaks to move around during screen time.
- Foster Offline Hobbies
Encourage your child to explore hobbies that don’t involve screens, such as reading, drawing, or playing a musical instrument. These activities not only reduce screen time but also promote creativity and cognitive development.
- Be a Role Model
Children often mimic their parent’s behaviors. By modeling healthy screen habits, like limiting your own screen time and engaging in offline activities, you set a positive example for your child.
- Use Technology Wisely
Leverage parental control tools to monitor and limit your child’s screen time. Apps like Apple’s Screen Time or Android’s Digital Wellbeing can help set specific time limits and ensure age-appropriate content.
- Establish a Structured Routine
A consistent daily schedule helps children transition smoothly between activities. Incorporate specific times for schoolwork, physical activity, family time, and screen time to maintain balance.
- Encourage Social Interaction
Organize playdates or family outings to promote face-to-face interactions. Socializing in person helps children develop essential communication skills and emotional intelligence.
The New School Year is Great Opportunity for New Routines
As the school year begins, it’s an ideal time to reassess your family’s screen time habits. Collaborate with your child to set realistic goals and establish routines that prioritize both academic responsibilities and personal well-being.
Remember, the goal isn’t to eliminate screen time entirely but to ensure it’s balanced with other enriching activities. By setting boundaries and encouraging diverse experiences, you help your child develop a healthier, more balanced lifestyle.
Seeking Support
Now it is time to begin….The thing that started out as a means to keep your little ones busy needs to go. It seemed great at first but you realize screentime is impacting you, your family’s harmony, and your child too! With consistent effort and clear boundaries, you can guide your child toward healthier screen habits.
If you feel you need support in managing screen time or have concerns about your child’s digital habits, professional guidance may be a great next step. Whether this looks like personal counseling for yourself or play therapy sessions for your child, you are not in this alone in this. We’re here to help! Visit our Therapist Page to learn more about each provider in our practice.
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Understanding Anxiety in Teens
Anxiety in Teens….What is going on?
Anxiety during the teenage years is often misunderstood. It’s not just nerves before a test or stress about a big game. For some teens, anxiety can feel like they’re constantly on edge like their mind is racing, and their heart is pounding. It can feel like something bad is just around the corner, even when everything seems “normal.” This can affect their focus, sleep, confidence, and relationships. Additionally, since teens are still learning how to express and manage intense emotions, anxiety can often go unnoticed or be mistaken for moodiness or defiance.
Let’s take a deeper look at what this can look like.
Why are Teens So Anxious?
Being a teenager today isn’t just about school dances and homework, it’s a constant balance between high expectations, social pressure, and a world that often feels uncertain.What are the specific contributors, you might ask?
Teens are Under Academic Pressures : The pressures on teens to excel in school are stronger than ever before. Competitive college entrance standards combined with the expectation to participate in extracurricular activities is a lot by itself. This along with the idea that they need to plan for their future can be oppressively stressful. A teen might worry obsessively about getting into the “right” college or maintaining straight As not always because they want to, but because they feel like falling short would disappoint everyone around them.
Social expectations are Strong : Whether it’s fitting in, standing out, or managing the constant performance of social media, teens often feel like they’re under a spotlight. A teen might delete a post if it doesn’t get enough likes or stress for hours after a group chat without a reply, convinced they’ve done something wrong. Teens experience anxiety around how they compare from clothing, to body strength, to the car they drive. There are many teens can get trapped in comparing themselves to others, resulting in worries and low self-esteem, and possibly body image issues.
Constant Peer pressure and Identity Exploration : From experimenting with relationships and navigating cliques, to figuring out who they are, teens today face an overwhelming mix of choices and judgments. A teen questioning their identity, for example, may feel intense anxiety about being misunderstood or rejected even in their own home.
Societal and Environmental Awareness : Many teens are deeply aware of issues like climate change, school shootings, economic instability, and political division. It’s not unusual for a teen to lie awake at night, not because of something they did, but because of everything they can’t control.
Anxiety, in this context, isn’t just about worrying. It’s about trying to grow up in a world that feels demanding, unpredictable, and sometimes unsafe, with a brain that’s still developing the tools to manage it all.
What causes teens to be vulnerable to anxiety?
- Biology & genetics
Some teens are naturally more sensitive to stress as a result of inherited traits or subtle brain chemistry differences.
- Life events & environment
Big changes like moving, family conflict, loss and other transitions can cause a teen’s instability. Even ongoing stress caused by things anticipated like bullying, school pressure, or practicing lockdown drills can bring anxiety to the surface.
- Social media & academic intensity
Social comparison, fear of missing out, and relentless performance standards all constantly bombard teens through their screens. Social media has a way of affecting individuals subconsciously, meaning they may not directly realize they’re comparing themselves, however, will start to develop habits that reflect self-shame, insecurity, or conformity. How would this create anxiety? you might ask. Imagine trying to change your appearance based on societal norms and still feeling like you don’t fit, so you become fixated on “getting it right”.
- Role modeling
Kids often pick up on their parent’s own stress levels if mom or dad are constantly anxious, that tension rubs off. Let’s say you’re always stressing about finances in front of your children, the emotional attachment they have to you causes them to feel when your energy’s off, and sometimes they adopt that worry.
How to Support Your Anxious Teen
Support comes in five key steps:
Notice first, then reach out
Start simple: “You seem quieter than usual, how are you feeling?” Not in the moment of stress, but afterward like during a walk or sitting over dinner.
Listen and validate, no quick fixes
Let them unload without interruption. Say things like, “That sounds overwhelming” or “I get it, that must feel awful.” This creates safety and trust.
Teach simple coping tools
- Deep breathing or grounding: basics like breathing in for 4, holding, and out for 6.
- Journaling: writing down emotions can lighten the load.
- Physical activity: anything from yoga to team sports, or even a short walk helps.
- Mindfulness/meditation: five quiet minutes doing nothing can reset major overload.
Encourage healthy daily habits
- Sleep: aim for 8–10 hours every night
- Nutrition: well-balanced meals feed their resilience
- Screen breaks: avoid the constant scroll to regroup.
Be the example
Share your own anxiety with honesty and transparency, your kid notices but show them how you handle it: a breathing break, a walk, even saying “I’m anxious, let me pause for a second.”
Counseling for Teens is Important!
If anxiety is so overwhelming it disrupts school, friendships, sleep, or self-care, it may be time to explore professional support options. A mental health professional can help your child learn how to navigate their anxiety. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is the gold standard. Other options include mindfulness-based therapy, medication, or a school counselor referral. Early steps pay off. Tools like mood-tracking apps, anxiety-focused school programs, or teen support groups can make a huge difference.
Let Me Reassure you, You’re Not Alone
Parenting a teen with anxiety is tough but so are they. By noticing the signs, validating how your teen feels, giving them tools, and showing them calm, you light a path forward. And if you ever feel stuck, you’re exactly the person who can help and that makes all the difference.
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Keeping Families Happy During Summer
Creating a Happy Family during Summer Break
For many families, summertime offers a break from the hustle and bustle of the school year and a chance to move at a much slower pace. Parents often enter the summer season excited to spend more time together and make fun memories as a family. However, now that everyone has settled in, you may feel that excitement wearing off if there is an increase in bickering and quarreling. Perhaps you’re starting to feel more like a referee for the increase in squabbles and sibling rivalry between your children. The lack of a normal routine, coupled with the extra family closeness is likely starting to take a toll on the family. We get it. Family conflict is normal and unavoidable, but it is important to know how to manage differences so that you are actually able to enjoy your summer! Here are some tips to help you navigate your family’s conflicts and work to strengthen your relationships this summer!
How to Improve Relationships Between Siblings
Spend time with each child individually
The best way to decrease sibling rivalry is to give each child positive, one-on-one attention, so they won’t seek negative attention from one another. Try to carve out 10-15 minutes a few times a week to spend with each child, doing an activity of their choice and nurturing their individual interests.
Avoid comparisons and labels
When you compare your children to one another or give them labels, such as “the wild one” and “my athletic one,” you are fueling the sibling rivalry. Instead, create opportunities for cooperation by focusing on the unique abilities of each child.
Know when to get involved
Sometimes, when a parent steps in to break up conflict, it can appear as though you are choosing a side. Try to avoid being the referee and let your children learn how to work through conflict, when possible.
Encourage finding a solution
While you may not always need to step in as a referee or judge, you can act as a mediator, helping your kids come up with a solution that appeals to both sides. Demonstrating compromise and problem-solving tools can equip your children to solve future conflicts.
Reward positive interactions
Take time to observe and point out positive interactions between your children. No need to go overboard, but your kids will appreciate the praise.
Get outside
Encourage time outdoors as much as possible. This will improve your children’s sleep mood, which will help them to better resolve conflicts with siblings.
Help identify triggers
You can help your children to prevent conflict beforehand by talking through situations that commonly lead to disputes and having them role-play how to handle those situations with respectful words and behaviors
Family Relationship Rules that Work!
Keep boundaries in place
Summer is not the time to forgo all of the family rules. Staying firm in your boundaries is healthy for your family. Be transparent about your expectations for one another during the summertime. Have a family meeting if you need to.
Maintain a light summer schedule
Along with keeping personal boundaries in place, your family will benefit from some sort of structure. Try to keep mealtime, screen time, and bedtime consistent. There’s still room for flexibility- bedtime can be later. Everyone will get along better if they’re getting enough sleep.
Play together
Enjoying fun activities together as a family provides opportunities for quality time, deeper family bonding, and healthy communication. These activities don’t have to be expensive or extravagant- it can be a family game night, movie night, picnic dinner, walk through the neighborhood, or trip to the park!
Find balance
Family activities are great, but don’t need to happen every day of summer. It’s healthy for everyone to have some downtime to themselves. Try to find a balance between planned activities together and quiet or “doing nothing” time apart. It’s okay to be bored sometimes!
Recognize and communicate feelings
When conflict arises, try to listen to how each person is feeling and point it out. Be direct with your words on how you’re feeling as well, using “I feel…” statements, rather than placing blame.
Remember to breathe
Emotions can run high during times of conflict. It’s okay to have strong feelings, but it’s important to model self-regulation for your family. Watch your tone of voice. Recognize when you need to step back and breathe before intervening in a state of high emotion.
Source(s): childrensmd.org, chadd.org, health.clevelandclinic.org, extension.usu.edu, today.com, gowoyo.org, myuscare.com, parentingsimply.com
Sometimes participating in Family Therapy can be a great way to kick off positive changes in your home. We have multiple therapists who can help you all begin communicating and spending time with each other in positive and enjoyable ways. Miracles Counseling Centers can help!
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Scroll Less, Live More: Break Free From The “Doom Scrolling” Cycle
In today’s hyper-connected world, it’s increasingly difficult to avoid negative news. Whether it’s catastrophic events, political conflict, or global crises, our access to information is both vast and immediate. Whenever a significant event occurs, coverage on the event can be available within minutes. Not only are headlines and articlesavailable, but the photos and videos from multiple perspectives will be posted over social media. The overload of news coverage means that we’re glued to our screens, unable to break free. This exposure can have an unintended impact on our mental health, even when we know it’s not good for us. To be informed and aware is valuable, but are there potential negative effects of being so tuned in?
What Is Doom Scrolling?
Doom scrolling, a term coined by Gen Z individuals on TikTok, refers to the habitual, and in some cases compulsive, overconsumption of news headlines and negative events on social media and other websites. This scrolling has become an unfortunate part of modern life, contributing to rising levels of anxiety, stress, and even depression. Doom scrolling applies to anyone who habitually consumes an overwhelming amount of distressing news online.
Depending on the age group, the type of online exposure to these events varies. A Gen Z individual on TikTok may have seen video about a negative current event that has a humorous spin. Millennials may have seen people on Facebook linking an article alongside their commentary on the event. Older generations may have seen coverage of the event on mainstream media news stations. Despite the different methods of delivery, each generation is undoubtedly overexposed to current events.
Why Is It So Harmful?
With this phenomenon, potential negative effects can materialize. In psychology, there is a pattern of negative thinking called rumination. Rumination refers to repetitive thinking or dwelling on a negative thought that is difficult to escape. With the overexposure to negative events that occur, individuals may find themselves in one of these negative thought cycles that lead to anxiety and/or depression. Hearing tragic news stories or stressful situations occurring within the world can greatly impact an individual’s stress level and can lead to these ruminations. Additionally, elevated stress levels can exacerbate existing struggles with anxiety, depression, or other mental health concerns.
In 2021, researchers from the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health conducted a study investigating the relationship between compulsive “doom scrolling” and negative mental health concerns. The researchers found that there was a significant increase in self-reported mental health concerns in individuals who reported the compulsive search for news. Additionally, researchers from the Journal of Psychological Trauma Theory, Research, Practice, and Policy found that many young individuals engaging in these behaviors exhibited significant symptoms of depression and even posttraumatic stress disorder simply from seeing online material surrounding these negative events even if they were not directly exposed.
How Can We Break Free from Doom Scrolling?
Our brains crave new information whether it is positive or negative. How do we break free from this cycle? Here are some potential actions that can be beneficial:
- Set time limits: Use apps or features on your phone to limit social media or news consumption. Both iPhone and Android devices have the capability of setting limits on specific apps. With Google Chrome, there are extensions on the Chrome Web Store to accomplish the same goal.
- Create digital boundaries: Designate times during the day to check news or social media and avoid mindless scrolling. Schedule half an hour every day to look at current events, and then do not allow yourself to engage in consuming news outside of that specific window.
- Engage in other activities: Replace scrolling with hobbies, exercise, or spending quality time with loved ones. Although social media seems to promote a sense of “connectedness”, it can also lead to perceived feelings of isolation. Go connect with others!
- Practice mindfulness: Focus on being present in the moment, and engage in mindfulness techniques like deep breathing, meditation, or journaling. Connect with nature and allow your brain to escape present concerns.
- Set Filters: Many social media apps such as Reddit, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and others allow you to filter out posts and media containing specific phrases. For example, if the presidential election was a source of stress for you, you could filter out any posts containing the word “president”.
- Seek Professional Help: If you find yourself incapable of escaping this cycle on your own, reach out to a licensed professional for assistance.
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5 Signs of Teenage Burnout
5 Signs of Teen Burnout
Teenage burnout is becoming increasingly common as young people juggle academic pressures, extracurricular activities, and social expectations. The reasons why teens are becoming more emotionally burned out and are struggling with anxiety and depression lies in the demands of our fast paced society. We commonly encourage teens to be well rounded in sports, AND participate in volunteering, AND excel academically to be competitive in the college application process. These influences coming from parents, coaches, teachers, and society are heard everywhere in a teens life. We also have to consider the notable impact of social media on our teens, which varying studies have shown to cause negative impacts on self esteem and feelings of inadequacy. The emotional toll including depression and anxiety that comes from life stressors is very real. Read this article so that you understand the indicators of teen burnout so you can support your child when they hit these struggles in life, and to help them rise above them.
You KNOW your teen is struggling
It’s evident when your teen is emotionally struggling with burnout. It can show up as the snappiness that seems to be just a bit more than typical for your teen. They might be honest with you and express that they don’t have enough time for everything. They could be trying to push all nighters just to keep up. Conversely, your teen may also be crashing to sleep the minute they walk through the doors or constantly seem exhausted. Seeing their light for life burnout is sad and concerning. You know that at this time in their youth, they should be finding enjoyment and living new experiences….You are right to be concerned.
5 Signs your Teen is Burned Out
There are ways you can recognize if your teen is in that burnout phase. Here are five signs that indicate a teen is experiencing burnout:
- **Exhaustion**: This goes beyond just feeling tired; it’s a persistent lack of energy that makes even daily tasks feel overwhelming. Your teen is struggling with this if their exhaustion is continuous for 1 week or longer.
- **Physical Signs**: Teens struggling with burnout frequently complain of headaches or stomach aches. A teen struggling with burn out struggles with a compromised immune system and may become sick more often. A change in your teens appetite can also indicate anxiety or depression due to stress.
- **Loss of Interest**: Activities that once brought joy—like hobbies, sports, or spending time with friends—may no longer seem appealing. Your teens’ connection with their friends is now be sidelined due to the constant pressure of their lives.
- **Darkening Mood or Cynicism**: Your teens outlook on life may be more negative life, often paired with feelings of hopelessness. Mood swings of depression and anger outbursts may be more commonplace than before. They can be feeling out of control of their life, and may have the perception that they are not able to succeed. These are signs of emotional fatique in managing life’s commitments.
- **Increased Anxiety**: Your teen is consistently expressing anxious thoughts about being enough. They may have thoughts of dread and worry about their readiness for their commitments or academic performance.
We help teens find balance and control In their lives
Therapists can play a crucial role in helping teens recover from burnout by providing emotional support, teaching coping strategies, and addressing the underlying causes of their stress. Through a variety of approaches, therapists are able to give the guidance and insight to help teens through life’s circumstances. Whether your teen needs to learn how to set boundaries, improve their self-compassion, or even needing a safe place to express themselves we can help them through their struggles with burn out. Your teen will take away a better understanding of themselves as well as the confidence to communicate their needs to be able to enjoy their lives again – and not feel exhausted from it!
Give them the chance to regain confidence in themselves
It’s important for teens to have support, whether through open conversations with family, friends, or mental health professionals. This is the opportunity you are affording them when a teenager begins counseling. Teens who begin counseling have the opportunity to address underlying issues early and improve their emotional resilience. Even more importantly, you are giving them the chance to support their development into adulthood. Our team loves to support adolescents in their journey towards adulthood, let us help them pave a healthy path forward!
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Supporting Teens Mental Health
A Guide to Supporting Teen Mental Health
If you are a parent of a teenager, you may be wondering how to best support your teen’s mental health, especially at a time when we are bombarded with stories about suicide, depression, Tik Tok trends, threats of school shootings, and so on. Parenting a teenager can often feel like trying to decode a complicated algorithm without the formula for doing so. While there is a myriad of resources available to assist parents in this journey, there are also some basic tenants to keep in mind which you can begin to apply today.
The Roller Coaster of Teen’s Emotional World
First of all, I want to encourage all parents and teens alike that these do not have to be the worst years of your life. True, adolescence involves a great deal of transition and growth, but it is not all negative and you are not doomed to years of heightened chaos and emotionality, as many believe. Second, it is crucial to understand what is happening during the teenage years so that you can keep your eye on the end game and not become lost in the daily process. Remember the reference to decoding your teen? Well, a huge part of that is recognizing the function of adolescence so that you as a parent do not misinterpret the ups and downs of behavior. In her book about the development of the teenage brain, Dr. Frances Jensen (2015) describes the process that goes into “building a brain” (p. 24). An adolescent brain possesses “an overabundance of gray matter (the neurons that form the basic building blocks of the brain) and an undersupply of white matter (the connective wiring that helps information flow efficiently from one part of the brain to the other)” (p. 26). Jensen likens the result of this developmental journey to that of obtaining “a brand-new Ferrari: it’s primed and pumped, but it hasn’t been road tested yet” (pp. 26-27). In other words, a teenager may look like an adult physically, but his/her brain is far from being fully prepared to make adult decisions or navigate adult emotions.
This information is important to keep in mind when trying to determine whether your teen’s behavior is the result of normal development or may be a warning sign of something deeper, such as a mental health concern. Admittedly, it can sometimes be difficult to discern the difference, which is why consistent communication and interaction is key. Assuming your teenager is fine or isn’t struggling because they are not acting out or vocalizing their struggle is not necessarily accurate. The reverse can also be true, however: not all teenage rebellion is the biproduct of anxiety or depression. The following paragraphs will attempt to outline symptoms and behaviors to pay attention to, as well as offer suggestions for providing support to your teen.
Signs and Symptoms of Teen Depression or Anxiety
This is by no means an exhaustive list and may vary in presentation from one individual to the next; however, here are some general signs or symptoms to be aware of in your teenager:
- Sudden changes in behavior or habits that cannot be explained by a medical condition or other identifiable stressor
- Increased conflict between peers or family members
- Increased withdrawal and isolation
- Excessive sleeping or an inability to sleep
- Substance abuse
- Promiscuous activity
- Binge eating, purging or restriction of food
- Excessive exercise
- Lack of motivation or procrastination
- Decreased performance in school or other activities
- Self-harm or suicidal thought/ideation
- Inability to focus or complete tasks; forgetfulness
- Frequent lashing out in anger or heightened emotion
- Frequent crying or an inability to stop crying
Understanding Your Teen’s Behavior
In order to know if these behaviors are new or unusual for your teen, it is necessary to keep tabs on their daily habits and activities and have a general awareness of their friends and the influence their peer group has on them. You don’t have to know all the details or micromanage (in fact, I advise against that), but you do need to take a regular pulse. Not only does this allow you to track patterns and notice possible problems, it also sends the message to your teen that you care and are interested in their life. Although many teens protest parental involvement, they actually do want to know you care. I cannot tell you how many teens tell me their parents are checked out, don’t care or don’t monitor their activities—they don’t say this with satisfaction, by the way; rather, it’s with a sad awareness that the adults in their life are not paying close enough attention.
Maintaining Connection
You may be wondering how to maintain this connection without your teen pushing you away or feeling you have to stock them on social media. For starters, establish some kind of regular check-in. I tell my teenage daughter to “keep me in the loop,” so this might take the form of a conversation over dinner, after school, in the car on the way to an activity, or, more often than not, late at night. As a parent to teens, we have to be available when they are ready to talk, even if their timing doesn’t match with ours or is inconvenient. If you can’t make the time when they are ready to talk, assure them you will make it a priority and follow through with them. It is also advisable to occasionally monitor their on-line activity and discuss parameters of how to utilize social media. For example, Snap Chat is not the place to post pictures of self-harm or a cry for help. Not only can these messages negatively impact others who view this material, it often won’t result in intervention. Other kids are not equipped to help their friends, nor should they have to, so it is critical your teen knows of at least one adult they can go to in a crisis.
Communicating With Your Teen
In addition to establishing a regular check-in or monitoring social media, make your home a place where your teen’s friends are welcome to hang out. This can provide you with a wealth of information about your child and allow you to truly assess their state of mind. Finally, never underestimate the power of a good old-fashioned question about how your teen is doing. Not everything has to be clandestine with adolescents. In fact, it is perfectly acceptable to ask your teen how they are doing. If they don’t feel comfortable talking, ask them to write you a letter or encourage them to talk to a counselor. The goal is to get them talking about their feelings and to create a safe space for them to process. In my experience, most teens would rather have a root canal than talk about their feelings, so your child may not get super deep with you, but at least they will know they can when push really comes to shove.
Additional Tips for Maintaining Strong Mental Health
Some final suggestions for helping to support your teen’s mental health include making sure they get adequate sleep, eat regular meals, engage in some form of regular movement or exercise, have down time without being on a device, and have an open-door policy to talk with you whenever they choose to do so.
You and your Teen can Solve anything Together
Keep in mind that not every difficult or dramatic behavior from your teen is a sign of dysfunction. Part of their brain development includes learning to emote in healthy and constructive ways. They don’t always know what they are feeling or how to describe it, so it can be challenging for them to communicate the reason behind tears, eye rolls, angry outbursts, etc. Sometimes an adolescent’s acting out is trying to tell you something deeper and they aren’t necessarily trying to be difficult or disrespectful. By the way, one of the biggest complaints I hear from teens is that their parents demand respect but often yell at or criticize their teen, in return. While their brain may still be developing, they do see this for the double standard that it is. Keep your cool, Parents. Believe it or not, teenagers are capable of fairly high-level conversations and are often logical in their thinking—it just may not be the same as your way of thinking. Again, fostering an environment where conversation is invited and productive is key.
References
Sarah Groff, LCMHC has worked in the mental health field for over 20 years in a variety of settings that have included the nonprofit and 
private practice sectors. This work has ranged from providing counseling and support to birth parents, adoptive parents and adoptees in the adoption field, to working with those infected with HIV/AIDS, to teaching undergraduate psychology courses, and now to private practice where she works with adolescents, individuals, couples, and families. Sarah truly loves her work and counts it as a privilege to come alongside clients in their most painful and celebratory moments of life. She has three children and has lived in the Lake Norman area for eight years.