Therapy Aftercare: 5 Growth Steps

Doing “The Work”

5 Steps to Maintain Your Growth Outside of Therapy

 

Therapy is powerful… but it’s not the whole picture. The real magic? This happens in between sessions, in your everyday life. Whetheryou’re fresh out of therapy, taking a break, or simply navigating your own healing path, “doing the work” is about showing up for yourselfwhen no one’s watching.   It’s about choosing to participate in your own growth. And while there’s no perfect formula, here are five key steps to help you stay grounded, empowered, and in forward motion outside of the therapy room.

 

1. Build a Self-Tending Practice (Not Just Self-Care)

Let’s go deeper than bubble baths. Self-tending means listening to what you need and responding with intention. Start with your inner world:

• Journal to process your emotions or track patterns in your thoughts.
• Read or listen to content that feeds your spirit – books, podcasts, or videos that mirror your journey or expand your view.
• Engage your body with movement that feels good, whether that’s yoga, working out, dancing in your kitchen, or just walking and breathing deeply.

Self-tending includes rest and hydration just as much as it includes turning off your phone and being still with yourself.

It’s how you remind yourself, “I matter.”

 

2. Stay Curious About Your Triggers

Do you ever find yourself triggered by something, but don’t understand why? Triggers aren’t just emotional landmines…they’re clues. When something (or someone) sets you off, instead of reacting automatically, pause. Ask yourself:

“What is this really about?”

“What part of me feels unsafe, unseen, or unloved?”

Use those moments as invitations to explore, become curious instead of reactive. Do a bit of research. Maybe it’s a trauma response, a nervous system flare-up, or a core belief being challenged. The more you understand your reactions, the more power you gain to shift them.

This is emotional intelligence in action. Curiosity turns discomfort into discovery.

 

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3. Rebalance Your Life Roles

If I asked you, “Who are you?” could you answer without leaning on the roles you play in others’ lives, the career that defines your days, or the labels the world has placed on you?

Seems hard, doesn’t it? That’s the internal conditioning that your worth is external.

You’re not just a title. You’re not only a parent, a partner, a student, or an employee. There’s a “you” underneath all the roles you play and all the hats you wear. Believe it or not, that’s the “you” that matters most.

Doing the work means checking in with yourself regularly. Ask: What do I like, outside of what’s expected of me? When do I feel most alive? What dreams have I put on hold, and why? It’s about engaging in hobbies, revisiting old passions, or even trying something completely new. The goal isn’t to impress anyone or meet a standard, it’s to make space for your identity to unfold, not just in relation to others, but in genuine connection to yourself.

 

4. Cultivate Healthy Connections

Healing doesn’t happen in isolation. While there are moments where solitude is necessary in your growth. Building healthy connections bridges the gap between self-discovery and shared humanity, reminding you that you don’t have to do life alone.

 Surround yourself with people who nourish, not drain, your energy. That might look like:

• Seeking out community spaces or support groups.
• Building deeper friendships rooted in honesty and mutual care.
• Limiting time with people who consistently leave you feeling small, unseen, or dysregulated.

Let’s face it, connecting with others isn’t always a walk in the park. Disagreements and misunderstandings happen. It’s life, we’re all a work in progress. What matters is how we handle it: taking space when needed, offering grace, owning our part, and staying open to growth. The goal isn’t perfection, it’s accountability, growth and connecting with others who are committed to the same.

Whether it’s one trusted person or a small circle, lean into relationships where you can be your whole self.

 

5. Make Meaning Through Mind-Body-Spirit Integration

True progress is holistic. It is likely you have discussed this in your previous therapy. It touches every part of you. So, ask: How am I aligning my inner work with my daily life?

• Spiritually, are you staying connected to something greater? That could be prayer, nature, meditation, or ancestral practices.
• Physically, are you tuning in? Is your body asking for rest, movement, nourishment?
• Mentally, are you challenging your old beliefs, replacing shame with compassion, and giving yourself permission to change?

This isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence. Reflect regularly. Ask what’s working and what needs adjusting. Small shifts lead to sustainable growth.

 

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Keep Doing Your Best, And Don’t Give Up on You!

 

Therapy is a great step to release, reflect, and reframe. It even adds the skills to your tool box for you to manage things when you’re on your own.  However, not doing the work outside of therapy is like spending hours touring gyms, watching workout videos, and buying fitness gear… then wondering why your muscles haven’t grown yet. Knowledge is important, but embodiment is where the change happens. You must do the work.

Some days, doing the work looks like deep self-reflection. Other days, it’s drinking water and stretching. It’s also not spiraling emotionally after a hard conversation. Either way, it counts. Doing “the work” isn’t a one-time fix. It’s a lifestyle… a practice of coming home to yourself, again and again.

You don’t have to have it all figured out to be growing outside of therapy. You just need to stay in motion, even if it’s slow. 

The most empowering part is that every step counts.